A Resolution that Stuck

Ten years ago I sat in my bedroom and started something that lasted. I was thirteen, thinking I knew just about everything. I wrote in my journal - bad grammar, atrocious spelling - about my goal for the coming year. So, just for you, here is what thirteen year old Sorine had to say on New Year's Day 2005:

"Geeze, it is going to be hard to write 05 up there from now on. But I guess that I will get used to it cuz I am going to write it in here every day! I no that I sed that 2 years ago and have only written 19 times since then, but I AM going to do it this year! And when you are full I'll get a new journal! Well it is kind of ovious that that is one of my new year resolutions."

Notice the fun style of writing I had in seventh grade. That's right, shortening words and spelling them incorrectly was very cool back then.

Anyway, ten years, 31 journals, and over 7500 pages later, I'm still writing every day. It did take a while to get used to and I missed a handful of days here and there. However, I can confidently say that I have not missed a day since 2007.

So, the question is, what have I learned from this? I've learned that goals can be accomplished. It is rough. I struggled doing it alone and tried to get others to join me. Turns out no one else finds journal writing parties as thrilling as I do. There were times I doubted myself, wondering if it was worth it. I mean, I can't tell you how many times I've written about how I spent the day reading in my pajamas and asked myself why I keep doing this. But I've thought a lot about it and came up with a few things that keep me going.

#1 - Determination
I've written consistently for ten years. TEN YEARS! That is a long time. I don't want to break the chain. Even if I just talk about how tired I am at the end of the day, I'm determined to keep going.

#2 - Entertainment
I'm a Goodworth. As I mentioned here, Goodworths find themselves to be very funny. I love going back and reading about how I think waltz is spelled so cool, and how I'm going to cook noodles inside of a pool noodle, and how I want to go to college to learn how to become a dinosaur. Basically, I'm just a funny person.

#3 - Facts/Solving Arguments
There have been many times where someone I know needed to know something - what day did we have that ward activity where I met my husband? When was I ordained? Where were we for Thanksgiving last year? These questions have occasionally turned into debates (particularly that Thanksgiving one) and by opening up my journal I can figure it out.

#4 - Memories
This is the one thing that keeps me going above everything else. I'm so grateful I have a record of what I thought the day my little sister died. I'm so glad I have copies of notes my little brother has written me. I love the fact that my journals talk about the friends I had and the crazy things we did.

While writing this blog post I've flipped through a couple of my old journals. I don't think I can fully express the way they make me feel. You know how I mentioned that no one else finds journal writing parties as thrilling as I do? Pretty sure it's the same way with journal reading parties. And that's the thing about my journals, as selfish as it may be, I write for myself. I don't think anyone else will ever sit down and read through an entire journal of mine. In fact, I kind of don't want someone to ever have to sit down and read through my entire journal. They are probably boring to other people.

Basically, what I'm trying to say is, I'm a journal nerd. And it is time I put it out there.