A date, or not a date...

When I started this blog, I didn't think it would become one of those annoying blogs that always posted about dating. However, as I look over my posts, that is what I tend to write about.

After reading just the title to my post "The Way to a Man's Heart", my brother said "Wait, YOU wrote this?" It is hard for him to believe that I have so many thoughts on something with which I am obviously not even slightly successful.

A little background: Since graduating high school three years ago, I've been on four blind dates. I've had one guy ask me on a date. And I've spent a lot of time giving advice to both boys and girls on how to act when it comes to dating. I'm not saying I should become a matchmaker, but I have seen the advice that I've given actually work. Whether that means the couple ended up married, or they ended up FINALLY breaking up. I kind of like to think that I had something to do with it.

Which brings me to my next bit of advice. This is for you, boys.

You see how up in that background it says I've only had one guy ask me on a date? Well, there might be a few people reading this thinking, um, excuse me? I know that isn't true. But here is the deal - it is true.

Guys - texting a girl does NOT count as asking her on a date! And neither does a Facebook message. Technology has ruined the true art of socializing. I know several people who have ended or even started a dating relationship over social media. Whether that is texting, Facebook, or even email. That is just plain stupid! Man up! Call her on the phone, ask her in person, something! We aren't in high school anymore, no need to hide behind a bush waiting to see her response to the heart attack you just left on her lawn. And girls, I don't know about you, but I'd much rather have a guy saying he wants to spend time talking with me rather than spend time texting me. Let him know that! Don't accept a date in that way. Simply say "why don't you call me and try asking that again." And more importantly, don't expect to get away with using technology to turn a guy down. If he had the respect to ask you on a proper date, you'd darn well better have the respect to politely turn him down face to face. Or, better yet, go on the date! Don't turn him down at all.

Think of it this way, boys, if you ask her on a date in a setting where she can hear your voice, she will be more likely to say yes. In the written world, she can easily turn you down without having to hear the disappointment in your voice or have a guilty conscience. When she can hear your voice or see your face, she will feel the fear and must say yes. That's right, you are understanding me correctly - scare her into going on a date with you. It just might be crazy enough to work! ;)

One of the reasons I don't count a "text date" as a real date is because the word "date" is rarely even used. So many girls have come to me saying "He just texted me. Asked me to a movie  - is it a date?" or "He wants to hang out tomorrow, just us, is it a date?" It is so confusing to try and decipher whether or not a guy is interested in you, let alone whether or not he is taking you on a real date or if he just wants someone to talk to. The sad part is, this doesn't happen just in the written world. The confusion can also come through a phone line or even, believe it or not, in a face to face setting. Boys - don't be afraid. Take the girl on an honest to goodness date and let her know you are doing it.

Remember - a date with a girl is no commitment. It is okay to take us on a date when you are only interested in being friends. It is okay to take us on a date and then realize "hey, this girl is boring, I don't think I'll date her again." Or "Man, that girl was just too much! She needs to back off. Think I'll be seeing less of her." Just remember, ask girls on dates and for goodness sake, don't do it in the written world.