No More Standing Back

EFY has always been something I look forward to. I have gone every year I possibly could, even multiple times. This past summer, being 18, was the last summer I could attend EFY as a participant. I want to be a counselor next summer, but I don't know for sure if that will happen. So, with the possibility of this being my last EFY experience EVER, I wanted to make the best of it.

Unfortunately, I had a hard time getting into it. I had such high expectations of what would happen and I kept comparing it to other sessions I had been to. I kept trying hard to feel a connection to my company and everything, it just wasn't working.

One night, during scripture study, I said a prayer asking my Heavenly Father for help. I had been near tears all week, wishing that I could just fit in. (Sorry, I'm sure I'm sounding like a loser. This really was a big deal to me though.) I open my scriptures to Hebrews chapter 2. What stood out to me the most was just the first part of verse three. It says, "How shall we escape, if we neglect . . ." I realized that I couldn't get through this if I just sat there expecting something to happen. I had to do the work.

It is funny how we often say we believe things or have faith in things or know things, but we hardly realize when these things are happening in our lives. I've always known that I have to do my part. The Lord will help me, but He isn't going to fix everything or take my trials away. Reading that scripture reminded me of this. I couldn't just sit aside and watch things play out. I needed to take action. So I did. And EFY turned out to be an amazing experience. Maybe some day I'll write another blog about all that I learned and how much my testimony grew.

Last night I was reading about this in my journal (yes, I'm a journal nerd. A very big journal nerd). Once again I realized I need to take action. No more standing back! I don't want to be the shy quiet girl in the corner. I don't want to be the one no one remembers. I'm not saying I am going to become loud and obnoxious (in a way I already am), I'm just saying I want to let people see me. From here on out I'm going to speak up. I'm going to get to know people.  I am standelfish no more!

Well, that was my attempt at being deep. I had big plans when I started writing this morning. But it is not the morning anymore. Oh, and in case you are wondering, here is what is going on in my apartment: Teri Ann's friend came over and they carved a pumpkin. He decided to make a pumpkin burger with the guts. Now it smells disgusting.

The End. :)

Lumps vs. Empty Spaces

I live in an apartment with five other girls. When one of us starts to cry, we all cry. We have ice cream parties way too much. We talk about everything and never shut up. We can’t just be doing our homework, the TV has to be on and so does music. Chocolate has become one of our main food groups. We make way too many trips to Walmart. This list could go on forever. And I’m not complaining. I love my roommates! I love the stupid things we all do. It’s just that hanging out with girls 24/7 can cause some problems. That many girls in one place at a time…yeah.

Anyway, this is about lumps and empty spaces, not spending too much time with girls. You see, I was talking to Alora and something you have to understand about us is that our conversations are the most random things ever and if you don’t know us you’d think we were on drugs (Example: this morning we talked about watching a beautiful turkeyfall and making turkeymen and going turkey sledding. She also told me to snuggle with a turkey). We ended up talking about how she has a lump (no, not a lump on the back of her neck that has teeth and is her twin).  

A lump is someone who just sits there and doesn’t really take action. Initially, lumps sound really boring. But, when compared to an empty space, lumps are great! (In case you are really ignorant, an empty space is an area that has nothing in it. Ha ha!)  Alora’s got the lump; I’ve got the empty space.

The more I think about it though, empty spaces aren’t that bad. They have potential. They can be relaxing. And really, my space isn’t all that empty. Like I said before, I’m living with five other girls. :)