Girls are jerks.

Okay. First of all, this isn't a post about girls and their drama. This is about how girls, namely me, can be jerks to the male gender.

You see, girls have this way of telling boys things. Meaning, we don't tell them things, we try and show them through our actions and expect them to understand. And when they don't understand, we'll spend our time complaining to each other and when the complaining session comes to an end, we conclude that all guys are jerks. But the truth is, girls are the jerks.

As I mentioned in a previous post, I've flat out told guys I like them. Of course, this wasn't an easy thing to do. Just ask my roommates, they'll tell you all about the panic I was in throughout the entire experience. It was terrifying. Yet, I managed to do it. For some odd reason, the idea of rejection was easier to handle than continually not knowing.

There were two times when I told a guy I was interested. They both handled it VERY differently. The first took me out on a date a few months later. The second was one of my best friends, he immediately told me he was also interested and wanted to take me out. That was probably the last normal conversation we had and we never did go on a date or anything. We don't talk much anymore. However, with both situations I've been okay with the outcome.

There have also been two times when I should have told the guy how I felt. Not because I was madly in love with him, but because I wasn't interested at all and he had made his intentions clear. The first was through high school and I was able to get away with just avoiding the situation all together. The second is happening now. After the one date we went on, I stayed up all night stressing about how to let him know I wasn't interested. Although I've convinced myself I tried to let him know (meaning I gave some pretty obvious clues) I haven't flat out told him. And I feel like a complete jerk.

So how come it's easier for me to tell a guy I'm interested and risk rejection than it is to tell a guy I'm not interested and risk having him hate me?

I don't know what it is, but something in me feels the need to protect these guys from rejection, even if it will benefit them in the long run. And it will. Not only will they become stronger from it, but it will free them up for other opportunities.

It pretty much just goes in a circle. I don't want to hurt someone and in the process of trying not to hurt them, I end up being a jerk. To avoid being a jerk, I prolong the awkwardness for selfish reasons.

Guys, is there even a way to kindly inform you of our disinterest?

Girls, we need to remember. The guy pays for the date, he's the one who generally does the asking. He's expected to open our doors, to plan the date, to entertain us, and through all of this he has to try and translate our "hints" into words that he can understand.

And this is what it boils down to. The guy plans the date, picks us up, pays for the activity, can be an absolute gentleman the entire time. And, whether we're interested or not, we let it happen. Girls are jerks.