Praying is a part of my everyday life. I love communicating with my Heavenly Father. Throughout the years, as I've learned more about prayer and gained a stronger testimony of its power, I've been able to gain a stronger relationship with my Heavenly Father than I ever thought possible.
I've been reading this book by S. Michael Wilcox called Face to Face. In it, he talks about the idea of pouring out your heart to God - telling him every detail of what is taking hold in your heart. By doing this, you are emptying your heart to allow room for Him to fill it. It is explained better in his book, I highly recommend reading it.
This idea of pouring out your heart in prayer is one that amazes me. It is so simple, yet so difficult.
Sometimes, when I pray, I feel that the issues occupying my mind aren't worthy of sharing with the Lord. I just have the ability to convince myself that my issues are insignificant, too small to take to the Lord. I know I'm not the only one who feels this way, others have expressed this same feeling to me, so I thought I'd share the experience I had today.
As the sacrament is being blessed and passed, I like to take the chance to sit in the quiet and think over the week I have just finished. I think about what I did, how I felt, where I can improve, and other such things. After thinking it over, I take it to the Lord and pray for the remainder of the sacrament. Today I had convinced myself that the Lord was busy with more important things and I wasn't willing to talk to Him about my week.
However, as I sat with my arms folded and my eyes closed, the thought that I needed to pray kept coming to me. Why? I thought. God has enough on His plate, He doesn't need my problems added to it. And then it came again, Sorine - You NEED to pray. I fought it again. God created worlds! His works are endless. His power is incomprehensible. I kept listing His creations and turned my thoughts to a prayer of gratitude.
And then the spirit spoke to me again. Sorine, it said, all this is true. But you are forgetting something - He created you, too.
Now, as I type that I realize it may seem a bit cheesy, It may seem like something I'd read off of a flowery handout in a Young Women's meeting. Yet, I believe it. And at that moment, sitting in the almost silent chapel, I felt God's love for me stronger than I have in a long time. I felt His desire to hear from me, His hope for me to pour out my hear to Him.
I was reading parts of a talk by President Uchtdorf titled "The Love of God" from the October 2009 conference. This particular part stood out to me. He said, "He loves us because He is filled with an infinite measure of holy, pure, and indescribable love. We are important to God not because of our resume, but because we are His children. He loves every one of us, even those who are flawed, rejected, awkward, sorrowful, or broken. God's love is so great that He loves even the proud, the selfish, the arrogant, and the wicked. . . Our infinitely compassionate Heavenly Father desires that we draw near to Him so that He can draw near to us."
God wants to hear from each one of His children. He desires to know every detail of my life. And yes, He is all knowing, He does see everything, and He would know what happened in my week even if I didn't pray to Him about it. But it means so much more to Him when I tell him. By pouring out my heart, I'm showing my Heavenly Father that I love Him, that I want Him to be a part of my life, and that I want His help.
I've had many moments where I poured out my heart to Heavenly Father and felt him fill it up with His love. Today was the first time I had this experience when it started out with me not wanting to even pray. I promise you, God does care about you! If something is important to you, it is important to Him. So why shouldn't you pray to Him about it? He cares about every detail of your life and He wants you to tell Him about it. As you do this, your relationship with Him will become stronger than you ever thought possible. you'll be able to feel His love for you deeper than before, and the answers to those difficult, personal questions will come.
In this same talk, President Uchtdorf says, "God does not look on the outward appearance. I believe that He doesn't care one bit if we live in a castle or a cottage, if we are handsome or homely, if we are famous or forgotten. Though we are incomplete, God loves us completely. Though we are imperfect, He loves us perfectly. Though we may feel lost and without compass, God's love encompasses us completely."
Remember - God loves you! And so do I. :)
